MY REPENTANCE

In the scriptures, we are commanded to examine ourselves  (2 Corinthians 13:5) As I continually examine myself, I find myself convicted of how awful a sinner that I am.  As most of you know and have seen, I often tend to share the passion the I have for the Lord. I can sit and speak for hours on the what the Lord is doing in my life. One would think that is a good thing, right?  However, many times, I start out with sharing my passion out of love for others, but then it often turns into an issue of pride. My initial intention is to follow the commands of the Word of God. (2 Corinthians 5:20) However, often without realizing it, my fleshly pride comes into play usually when what I am saying is resisted or scoffed at.    So what starts out as love often turns into the sinfulness of pride.  

  I am thankful that God is patient with me. As I continue to grow and mature in the faith, I am determined to let the Lord work  in me in a way that is pleasing to Him. I am not only going to stumble at times, but I am going to fall and fall hard. It is only by the blood of Christ, that I can continue to move forward in my walk.

I have been aware (and often reminded) of 1 Corinthians 13:2....If I have.....all knowledge; and if I have all faith , so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 

Until recently, I have truly believed that the conversations that I have with my Dad were out of love and a strong desire for him to know Christ. I am now aware that even though that these conversations started out with that intent, they deteriorated into me trying to make a point. (my pride)  This deterioration and the way I responded to others has caused some family members pain and sorrow and for that I am truly sorry.  I ask for your forgiveness here, and I will do so also in person when I see you. 

I am thankful to the Lord Jesus Christ who continues to mold me into the person that He wants me to be. I am also thankful for my wife, Kathy, who patiently allows me to struggle through these issues, while at the same time lovingly prods me in the right direction. I am also thankful to my brothers in Christ whose wise counsel has encouraged me to be more Christ-like. 

As I mentioned above, I have been aware of 1 Corinthians 13:2.  As we continue to read, v 13: 4-7, these verses explain what love looks like......That is where I have been lacking. The Lord convicted me of that truth recently. This is where I struggle. This is where the Lord is working on me at the moment. 

As I move forward in my walk,  I am reminded of Mark 10:45 For even the Son of Man did not come to be  served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.